Remaining Vivid
by Fantasella
Summary: Hermione is pregnant with Ron's child in her sixth year, and she has to make the decision of whether on not she wants to keep the child. She also learns just how loyal friends can truly be in times of need. Takes place from Hermione's point of view in the beginning of Half-Blood Prince. New updates every Sunday.
1. Chapter 1

**This story takes place during the beginning of the sixth year, from Hermione's point of view. I'm not concentrating much on the Voldemort-events of the story, and more the social aspect.**

**I own nothing, and all belongs to the glory that is JK Rowling. **

The toilet seat is cold as I grasp on to it, vomiting the last of my breakfast before sitting back on the ground and breathing deeply. The floor is hard and chilly, and I lean my head back against the bathroom door before regaining my strength and climbing to my feet. My legs are shaky as I flush the toilet and open the door, checking the sink area to make sure no one had followed me. I was walking to the library after breakfast and barely made it to the second-floor bathroom before spewing what I had just swallowed.

"Oooh… Hermione," a shrill voice spoke behind me as I washed my hands at the marble sinks. I turned and saw Moaning Myrtle. "Hermione's sick… why is Hermione sick?"

"Shut up, Myrtle," I say, facing the sink again while scrubbing my hands with soap. I'm not in the mood to talk to Myrtle about my problems.

"No, really, Hermione. Why are you sick?" Myrtle asks again. I finally turn around and storm out of the bathroom.

It is a weekend, so I don't have class today. There is a quidditch game between Slytherin and Hufflepuff this afternoon that I told Ron I would go to, but I could probably just cancel with him. I'm not sure what I would tell him anyway. The pit of dread in my stomach is to big for conversations about snitches and beaters.

When I get back to the Gryffindor common room, I search for an empty spot to sit in and curl up with my book. Just as I start to head to a armchair in the corner, Ginny spots me and starts waving me over.

"Hey, Hermione! Come sit over here! We haven't talked in a while!"

I sigh, but head over to Ginny anyway. Even though she is a year below me, she is one of my closest female friends, and it might do me good to talk to another woman.

"Hey Ginny," I say as I take a seat in the armchair across from her. She closes her notebook and turns to me with the energy she always seems to have.

"Hi, Hermione! How have you been? I feel like it's been forever since we talked!"

We sat next to each other at dinner last night, but I don't mention it.

"I've been okay. What about you?" I say.

"I've been good. My quidditch practices have been going better and better. It's tiring, but fun." As Ginny chatters on about quidditch, I let my mind wander. As I look out of the window that is behind Ginny, I start to feel the nausea from this morning. Just as I am about to excuse myself to go to the bathroom, I feel vomit start to come up my throat again. I jump up and barely make it to the bathroom, which is thankfully empty.

I lost most of my food this morning, so I am mostly dry heaving into the toilet. As I gasp for air, I feel Ginny's hand on my back, pulling up my hair.

"Hermione, are you okay? I'm worried about you. We should get you to Madam Pomfrey," she says as I regain my strength and stand up. Ginny's face has a concerned frown plastered across it.

"I'm fine, Ginny. I just need to lie down," I say as I head to the sinks to rinse out my mouth. But I know she won't relent that quickly.

"No, Hermione, if you're throwing up than you need to go to Madam Pomfrey. Do you have a fever or something? I think the flu might be going around, even though it's September," she says.

"No, really. I'm fine," I say, trying to push past her to the door. I don't need her nosing into my problems.

"Hermione. Stop," she says, and I am forced to look into her face. "What's wrong?"

I sigh. I did originally go to talk to Ginny so I could gain some female advice. Maybe she could help me in some way.

"Fine." I say, taking a step back from her. "I think I'm pregnant."

Ginny's face moves like a cartoon characters, from shock to understanding to pity. She opens her mouth as if to say something, but then closes it again. She is finally able to get a word out.

"What?"

"I know. I'm not totally sure yet. It's just… I don't know." I realize how weak I feel after saying this, and lean back against the bathroom wall.

I'm not sure what I expected Ginny's reaction to be, but I'm glad when she reaches forward to hug me. When we pull away from each other, the stress that I've been holding in since I first suspected it leaks out of me in tear formation.

"It's just, I thought that my protection spell was good enough, but something must of happened, and then I missed my cycle…" I falter when Ginny hands me a paper towel to use as a tissue.

"It's fine," Ginny says. "We should talk about this somewhere else. Do you think anyone else will be in your dorm?" I shake my head. "Great. Let's go there. We'll figure this out."

We head up the carpeted spiral stairs to my dorm, Ginny shielding me from the eyes of peers as we walk the short distance from the bathroom to the stairs. Fortunately, I don't think anyone saw me. When we get to my dorm, I check to make sure no one is there, and then collapse on my bed with Ginny next to me.

"Do you want to just start from the beginning?" Ginny asks after a few moments of my sniffling.

"I guess so," I say, sighing once more. "I guess the beginning is the act itself, huh?" I take a deep breath. "When we first got back to Hogwarts, Ron and I had been dating for most of the summer. And we still hadn't _done it, _you know? So we decided to try it, and I looked up a protection spell in the library. The book was a little faded in some places, so I wasn't able to read the entire thing. But I thought it was okay, and that I had understood enough to make it work. So Ron and I snuck out that night and we did it in some abandoned room." I take another breath, and Ginny uses that time to cut in.

"Did he pressure you or something?" Ginny asks. I have to give it to her that she hasn't reacted too weirdly about the fact that I'm talking about her brother, or that she is the baby's aunt.

"No, not it all. We made the decision together," I stare at the wall, remembering that night. I thought the spell would work just fine. And I was a little bit excited, even. I had talked to a few of my muggle friends over the summer, and a couple of them talked about their firsts with their boyfriends. As much as I hate to admit it, sometimes I wish for a normal life, where I'm not constantly tracking down murderers or creating potions. I want that high school experience that muggles talk about, where you play spin the bottle and have to deal with SATs. So even though I wanted to have sex with Ron, now that I look back, I don't think I was ready. I wanted him, but I also wanted the experience itself.

"Okay," Ginny says. I think she is taking it all in bit by bit. "Go on."

"Anyway, so we did it and I thought I was fine. But my period was supposed to show up the next week, and it is always on schedule. Always. But it didn't come, and I kept hoping it would , which I've never hoped before, and it still didn't come. And then this morning I threw up after breakfast, and then with you.

"But it's not just that. I also have a _feeling _you know? I know what I always say about divination and stuff, but I kind of just know."

"Okay," Ginny says, taking a deep breath. "So what are you going to do?"

This is where I am stuck. "I don't know. I don't even know if I want to keep it. I'm not even sure if there is a way to get rid of it." Pregnancy and general reproduction is a very taboo subject in the wizarding world. I remember once finding Lavender Brown crying in the girls bathroom in my third year because she had found a red stain on her underwear and wasn't sure what it was. I'm not sure if abortion is even a thing in the wizarding world.

"There are some ways to get rid of it, if you want to," Ginny says, turning to me. "I think there's a potion you can make. But it only works during the early stages of pregnancy. I think the first six weeks, so you have a bit of time."

I nod my head. "I just want to think about it for a bit. I wasn't even sure there was a way to stop the pregnancy."

Ginny gives a small nod of her head, and then pauses. After a few seconds of silence, she asks me the question I have been dreading.

"Have you told Ron yet?"

I remain silent. I don't want to have this conversation with Ron. I love him, truly, but I'm not sure if I want to ruin his life like this. I want to preserve that spark of joy he always has in his eyes.

After I don't answer for a few moments, Ginny looks straight into my eyes, forcing me to look back.

"Hermione, you have to tell him. He has as much of a right to this baby as you do."

I know that. But it's just hard to start a conversation.

"Hermione, seriously. You need to tell him. I know it's hard, but he'll talk to you. He's good about the really serious conversations." Ginny continues.

I nod my head, finally showing signs of response. "I know I have to tell him. I just don't want him to react badly. And what if he breaks up with me over this? I haven't even told my parents about this yet. Who will I have left?" Tears start to leak from my eyes, and Ginny reaches out to grab my hand.

"Hermione. Look at me," I open my eyes to peek at Ginny. "This isn't the end of everything. Even if he isn't there for you-which he will be-you still have me, and Harry, and every other decent person. And so what if Ron doesn't react well? This isn't really about him."

"I know," I say, openly sobbing now. I wipe away tears with one hand and grip Ginny's palm with the other. "It's just…how could I let this happen? What's wrong with me?"

"No. Stop it," Ginny says. "This isn't only your fault. I love Ron, but he is at equal blame here. And you have to tell him."

I nod. "I know."

"Do you want me to be with you when you tell him?" Ginny asks.

I shake my head. "No, this is something I have to do alone."

"Okay. Do you want me to bring him up?" When Harry, Ron, and I started planning for Dumbledore's Army last year we figured out that the girl's dormitory is much easier to discuss private matters in, and even found a little room that is never used where we could talk. I ended up creating a portkey to the room, and boys don't get sent away from the dormitory when using it.

"Sure," I say, swallowing hard and blowing my noise. "Thank you, Ginny."

"No problem," Ginny says, pulling me in for a tight hug. "You would do the same for me." And then she smiles at me and disappears down the stairs to get Ron.

I head over to the little room Harry, Ron, and I used to talk in. It has a small window on one side, and a dusty maroon couch at the end of it. There are a few candles on a tiny marble table, and I light them with the hopes that they would give Ron some amount of placidity when I break the news to him.

I am sitting down on the end of the couch when Ron appears at the doorway. He smiles at me and sits down next to me.

"Ginny said that you needed to see me. What's up?" Ron asks after giving me a quick peck on the lips.

"Well…" In that moment, the innocence of Ron scares me more than anything else. I don't want him to leave me, and I don't want this baby to break him.

I decide that the best way to drop the news is quickly. "I'm pregnant."

Ron's face turns from a playful smile to a shocked frown in a moment. "What do you mean?" He asks.

"I'm pregnant." I say again, more firmly.

"Bloody hell, Hermione! You're kidding, right? I thought you used a spell or something! How could you let this happen?"

I loose my patience. I had spent the day in pure pain, and worrying about hurting Ron's innocence, and he was putting this on me? I cannot deal with him acting like it is my fault.

"Excuse me? How are you blaming me for this?" I yell back. We are both standing now, screaming, and I am crying again. "This is in no way only my fault. And you are not allowed to be just another guy in this scenario. You are as much a parent to this child as I am, and you are going to act like it!"

"I don't get it! How could this have happened? You're the spell girl, little-miss-perfect! This was supposed to go differently, not-" Ron gets cut of when a sudden thud sounds behind us. We turn simultaneously, and see Harry standing against the doorframe, staring at us as if he just saw Merlin. I furiously wipe away tears and try to regain my breath.

"Errr… Sorry," Harry says after a few awkward moments of silence. "I was just coming up to study because the common room was loud, and I didn't think you guys would be here… Hermione, are you okay?" He says, finally noticing my tear-stained face.

Before I can lie and tell him that I am fine so I can go cry alone in my room, Ron cuts in.

"No, she is not okay!" He yells, creating an unnaturally loud noise in the tiny room. Harry and I both wince. "She is pregnant, and I'm the father, and I don't know what she wants!"

"You're pregnant?" Harry says, turning to me wide-eyed.

"Yeah," I say quietly. Harry stands their for a minute, processing, and the room is silent besides our breaths.

"Do you want me to leave you two alone?" Harry finally asks.

"No," I say, walking towards the door. "I don't want to deal with _him_," I point to Ron. "Anymore." I storm out the door, heading for my dorm, but Harry catches up with me first.

"I'm sorry," he says as I collapse on my bed. I look up at him standing awkwardly above me.

"Why?" I ask.

"Just… about Ron. I know it must be hard. And…about the situation in general."

I laugh. "I doubt apologies are going to do much now. I guess one from Ron would be nice, though."

"I know," he says soberly. "Do you know what you're going to do with…it?"

"I think I might get rid of it. I'm just not sure how, or what would happen if I did keep it."

"Yeah." I say. Harry sits down on the bed next to me, and we rest in silence for a moment.

I finally break the quiet with the question of a thought that has been looming over me. "What do I tell my parents?"

Harry turns to me. "I don't know, Hermione. I guess you just tell them the truth. You were going to go home for your fall break, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so." The fall break was coming up in only a couple of weeks. "You were going to come with me for this one."

"I don't have to come if you don't want me to." Harry says. "I get how you might want to do this alone."

"I think it might be good to have some support there. I wish I could just write them a letter, but that would be a bit cruel, even for me."

"I guess so." Harry says. We sit there in silence for a moment. "Do you want to go to the quidditch game?"

I was feeling a bit better, and the game might be a good distraction. "I don't think Ron really wants me there right now." I say.

"You can sit with me, away from him. He's the one being a jerk right now. I'm sure he'll come around soon, though. You didn't do anything wrong."

"Thanks, Harry." I say, feeling especially grateful for a friend like him right now. I feel like sometimes he doesn't concentrate as much on his friends as he does himself, even though that is acceptable, considering the whole Voldemort thing. But there are times like this where I want to take back all of those things I think about him. I lean in to give him a quick hug, and then we head to the quidditch match.

The game is relatively boring. I spend most of it in a daze, not truly concentrating on the plays. I see Ron sitting a few rows ahead of us, and I keep looking at him, both hoping he'll say something to me and that he'll just get lost. Hufflepuff wins, and me, Harry, and Ginny head back to the castle together. We talk about everything except my pregnancy-school, our summers, the books were reading. I am incredibly thankful for the distraction.

Later that day Ginny approaches me with a book while I am reading in the dying light of the sun in the corner of the common room.

"What's that?" I ask as she sits down across from me.

"I know you haven't made a decision yet, but I found the potion if you want to get rid of the baby."

I sigh. I've been trying to block out thoughts of the kid after my talk with Harry, but my peace didn't last that long. "What's in it?" I ask.

"It's pretty simple," Ginny responds, flipping to the page in the book. "We would have to take a few things from Snape's store room, but they would be relatively easy to steal. We need to stir it for a full hour, but that could be done over a weekend. Overall, pretty simple."

"I guess so," I say, scanning the page. "Do you think I should? Get rid of it, I mean."

Ginny sighs. "I don't really know, 'Mione. I think personally I would get rid of it, just because I don't have the time or money to raise a kid. But you're a different person than me. I can't make a decision like this with you."

I guess so. I thank Ginny for the book, and then head up to my room to go to bed early. I lie awake for hours at night, thinking. I certainly have a big decision to make.

**Author's note: Thanks for reading! I just wanted to say that I know abortion is a controversial topic right now. I personally support a woman's choice, and I realize that some people do not agree with this. This story is not a political statement, it is just a piece of fanfiction I enjoyed writing.**

**It would make my day if you reviewed! Constructive criticism is always appreciated, and I'll answer any questions. Just a heads up, I plan to continue this story in the near future, so if you liked it following it would probably be beneficial.**


	2. Chapter 2

**As always, nothing belongs to me.**

_Fire. There is fire all around me, blazing hot, creating a tunnel where it has encaged me. I am fighting for breath, the smoke filling my lungs, burning me inside and out. On one end of the tunnel I hear laughing, and joy filling the area. Ron, Harry, Ginny, my family. Everyone I have ever cared about, laughing to each other about things that I haven't heard or want to hear. But the giddy noises are interrupted by cries from the other side of the tunnel. I try to find what is making the infant cries, but all I see is smoke. _

_ The cries and laughter get louder, and the walls are closing in on me, making me feel the flames lick my body. I run towards the wails, searching for a source of noise, but all I see is fire._

_ I close my eyes and scream._

I wake up drenched in sweat, half off the bed. My heart rate is about a mile a minute, and I put my hand on my chest, trying to calm my breaths. _In, out. In, out. _After a few of these I pull back the maroon curtain around my bed and survey the rest of the room. It is mostly dark, save the small amounts of light rising from the window. All of the other girls must be asleep.

I lie my head back down on the pillow and try to head into the slumber I had recently ceased to exist in, but I stayed wide awake. I finally decided to officially get up and start the day. 'Early bird gets the worm,' right? I went through all of my morning activities with robotic motions, trying my hardest not to think about my dream. For once I _didn't _want to analyze something.

The sun was still rising when I made my way down to the common room. The few morning birds were awake, but I knew none of them. I evaluated my options. I could go eat breakfast, but I wouldn't know anyone there and was worried about throwing up again. I could read in the common room, but I was in danger of running into Ron when he comes downstairs. I finally decided to just head to the library and work on homework. I had a three foot long paper due on the history of winged creature naming, and I wanted a good grade.

As I walked to the library, I couldn't help analyzing my dream. I rarely had nightmares that didn't involve dark magic. I could believe that I was this worried about the child, but in the dream I was willing to turn my back on my family and friends for this kid. Would I really do this in reality?

I had never really stopped to wonder what would happen if I kept the baby. Where would I live? I certainly wouldn't be able to stay in school with the child. If my parents excepted me like this, I could probably live there. But I was more worried than I let on to my friends about my parents finding out. Over the summer between my second and third year, me and my friend watched all of the _Gilmore Girls _seasons over the course of two months, plus the Netflix reboot. And when my mom found out about this, she naturally wanted to watch with us. She got through a single episode before talking to us for an hour about the importance of only getting pregnant, or risking getting pregnant, after marriage.

But for some reason, deep down inside, I almost wanted to keep the baby. It might have been the dream, or it might of just been what I have always wanted, but I wanted to mother this child. I have always wanted to have a kid to watch grow, teach about magic, and send off to school. I just never thought that this time would be now.

I finally entered the library and sat down at a table near a window in the back corner. I was just unfurling my paper when I caught sight of Harry across the room.

I'll be honest, I normally love talking to Harry, but I wasn't in the mood for conversation with anyone but my own thoughts right now. I got up to move deeper into the library, but Harry caught sight of me first and smiled at me. I couldn't very well walk away from him now, so I headed over and sat down from the armchair across from him.

"You're up early," I said, leaning back into the fluffy cushions.

"Yeah, Neville was snoring unnaturally loud and I couldn't fall back asleep. Why are you up?" he asked. I could tell that he wanted to poke more into my feelings on the baby, but didn't want to push me.

"Oh, just a weird dream," I said.

"Oh, really? What was it about?" Harry asked. "I mean, if you want to talk."

Harry had always been interested in our dreams, ever since he started getting nightmares from Voldemort. I decided to open up to him. Maybe it will help me decide if I wanted to keep the baby.

"It was really strange," I say, sighing. "I was in this burning tunnel, made of fire. On one side of the tunnel stood my family, friends, basically everyone in my life. And you were all laughing and joking, like you didn't even notice the tunnel or anything.

"Really? Did you go towards them? Was I there?"

"Of course you were there. But that's not the scary thing. There was this wailing coming from the other end of the tunnel, but I couldn't pinpoint the noise. I ran towards the noise but there wasn't anything making it. But the crying kept getting louder, as well as the laughing, and then I woke up."

Harry is quiet for a long time. I finally can't resist not hearing his opinion on the matter. "So?" I say.

Harry breathes out a long breath through his nose. "I think your dream is telling you to keep the baby," he says. I nod my head. That is what I thought in the first place. "But you should remember that the dream doesn't dictate your decision. Everyone has weird dreams every once in a while. You could still use that potion and get rid of it. That is, if you want to. Do you want to?"

"I don't totally know. Deep inside, I think I want to keep the baby," Harry doesn't look surprised at all, which minorly shocks me. "But I just don't know how. I don't think my parents will be supportive. And I would have to drop out of school. And Ron…" I drift off.

"Do me a favor," Harry says. "Don't think about Ron for a minute. I know I'm kind of a jerk for saying this, but I don't think you two were really meant for each other."

"Really?" I say, even though I could see it. Ron and I had always gotten along, but I feel like I put a mask on whenever I see him. I feel like I can't be my real self around him. And it hasn't always been that way. Back when we were just friends, I was always "me" with Harry, Ron, and later Ginny. But ever since I started dating Ron, that feeling disappeared. I could still be open with Harry and Ginny, but something changed between Ron and I when we started dating.

"Yeah," Harry says. "But maybe I'm wrong. I mean, who am I to say anything about your relationship."

"No," I respond. "I think you might be right. I never really felt like we were completely right together."

"Yeah," Harry says, sighing and leaning back into the leather chair. "Me and Ginny have been kind of weird lately."

I am thankful for the change in conversation. "Why?" I ask.

"I don't know. I feel like she hasn't been talking to me as much as she used to. And whenever we do sit down and have an actual conversation, she feels kind of distant. I keep trying to get her to open up to me, but it's not like it used to be."

"I get what you mean." I say. "I feel like most of my relationships are about to be ruined."

Harry gives me a sad smile and reaches out to pat my hand. "I'm still here," he says.

I smile back. "Thank you," I say softly.

The next week passes by in a blur. Me and Ron still stay far away from each other, and I try to surround myself with positive people. Ginny and I talk often, and she is the one who helps me finally decide.

"So, how have you been?" Ginny asks as I settle in next to her on a maroon couch in the Gryffindor common room.

"I've been okay," I say. "Not much has happened."

"And how is… it?" Ginny asks.

"I think it's fine." I reply. I've been having more feelings about the baby, as if it is telling me things. I'm not showing yet, but I feel bigger.

"I don't mean to rush you, Hermione," Ginny says. "But the window of time where that potion will work is closing. I just think you should decide soon, in case there are any complications that hold us up while were making it."

"Actually, I think I have decided," I say, pulling in all the strength I have. "I'm going to keep it."

"Really?" Ginny says. She looks shocked. "How? I mean, I'm totally supportive, but… where are you going to live? How are you going to support this baby?"

"I'm going to figure out a way," I say, suddenly confident. "It just feel like I'm meant to have this kid."

"Okay, Hermione," Ginny says, smiling slightly. "What now?"

"I don't know. I guess I have to check with the school to learn about how long I can stay here for. And I should check in with Madam Pomfrey."

"Yeah, I guess so," Ginny says. "I can come with you to Madam Pomfrey, if you want."

"Would you? I'm a little nervous."

"Sure, 'Mione." She says. We head over to Madam Pomfrey, talking I the hall about the new potions assignment.

Madam Pomfrey's office is thankfully empty when we arrive. I knock on the door and wait for her to answer.

Madam Pomfrey opens the door to her office, her hair in a tight bun and her face tense, as always.

"Why, hello, girls," she says when she sees it's us. "Why are you here?"

"Well… I say, stalling for as long as possible until I have to break the news. "I'm pregnant."

Madam Pomfrey only shows a moment of shock before returning her face to its normal strained expression. "Well, that certainly is a reason to come to me. Come in."

She ushers me and Ginny into the office and sits us down at a small desk across from her. The smell of herbs and certain potions fill the air.

"So, how many weeks have you been pregnant?" Madam Pomfrey asks, pulling out a parchment paper and quill.

"I think about six," I respond.

"Any symptoms?" she asks, scribbling as I speak.

"Er… I've been really tired recently, and I have morning sickness every so often. And some cramping."

"Okay. These are all normal. I can give you something to help with he morning sickness. Who is the father?"

"Um…" I say, not sure how to tell her. "Ronald Weasley."

Her eyes fly up from the paper. "Ronald Weasley!" and then she shows as close to a smirk I've seen from her. "I didn't think he had it in him."

Me and Ginny exchange a quick smirk. I don't think I thought he had it in him either.

"Well, you seem to be on track with your pregnancy. Do you have any plans for where you are going to go when you give birth?" she asks.

"I'm visiting my parents in a week for the fall break. I'll ask if I can stay with them once I leave school then. Do you have any idea how long I'll be able to stay in school for?" I ask nervously.

"I'm not sure. We'll have to meet with Professor McGonagall. There isn't a specific set of regulations for this." Over the course of the meeting Madam Pomfrey had turned from stern to compassionate. "I can see if she is free for a meeting now. If not, come back in a few weeks to check on your progress. Oh, and while you're here, take this book." She hands me a dusty tome with _Pregnancy in Witches _written on the front in spiraling calligraphy. "It may be able to help you."

"Thank you," I say, and then she is off to see if Professor McGonagall can talk with us.

"This is good, right?" I ask Ginny. I'm not totally sure what to think about the situation. Everything is happening so fast.

"Yeah, I guess so," Ginny says. "I mean, at least we know that you're healthy."

"Yeah," I sigh. Me and Ginny sit in silence until Madam Pomfrey comes back with Professor McGonagall.

"Hello, girls," Professor McGonagall says, taking a seat with Madam Pomfrey across from us. "I hear that we have a new situation.

"Um… yes," I say. Once you tell a few people that your pregnant, it starts to get easier. "I'm pregnant."

"Yes, that is what I heard." Professor McGonagall's voice is cold and stiff. "I'm afraid that we have a strict protocol for this sort of thing."

"Well, what is that protocol?" Ginny asks.

"You must understand, before I tell you, that Hogwarts is known as one of the best wizarding schools in the world. We have created an aura that our students are sophisticated, intelligent, and do not preform troublesome actions. This is what parents know, and this is why parents send their children to us."

Professor McGonagall pauses for a breath, and my stomach sinks to a pit of dread. So far, her speech isn't making my prospects look good.

"Normally, we would send a student home the minute we learned that they are pregnant. However, you are a wonderful student Hermione, and we are willing to extend this period to when you are visibly pregnant. This is only allowed if you do not speak to anyone else about your pregnancy."

Ginny, Madam Pomfrey, and I all stare at her in shock. I think my mouth falls open, but it's hard to tell, since I HAVE TO LEAVE SCHOOL.

Madam Pomfrey finally has the mental capability to speak up first. "This can't possibly be the regulation. Hermione is a good student who needs an education."

"Yeah, McGonagall," Ginny speaks up. I can tell immediately that her talking is going to make the situation better in no way, but I'm not in the mood to stop her. "I thought you always were crazy about education, and now you're willing to give up the schooling of one of your top students so you look better. The world really is cruel."

"Weasley," Professor McGonagall says in a warning voice. We all shut up.

"I expect you to follow these rules. I suggest you should leave around at around nine weeks, in case you start showing around then. I believe that was when I began. What about you, Madam Pomfrey?"

Wordlessly, Madam Pomfrey nods.

"Now, I suggest you girls be on your way. Remember-not a word."

And, like the pathetic cowards we are, me and Ginny silently walk out of the office. We make it halfway to Gryffindor common room before breaking.

"I can't believe her!" Ginny says at the exact same moment I say, "My life is over!"

"What do you mean your life is over?" Ginny asks, pausing her coming rant.

"No more school! School is life!" I say, barely able to get out the words.

"No, it's not," Ginny says, showing me the rare, rebellious side of her. "You'll be fine. You can get an education somewhere else. Concentrate on this right now."

"You're right." I say, trying to calm myself down. "But now I have, like, three weeks to find a place to live! What if my parents don't take me in?"

"You'll be fine." Ginny says again, reassuringly. "You'll figure it out. Let's do something else right now. I think we both need a distraction."

I feebly nod, and follow Ginny. After a minute of walking, I realize were not headed towards the Gryffindor common room.

"Ginny?" I ask. "Where are we going?"

"Just follow me," she says calmly.

I evaluate my options. I could keep following her, and see where she takes me. But there's something in her voice that makes me feel like we're not just going to study in the library. I could convince her to turn around with me, but what's the point of that? I'm going to be kicked out of school anyway, and based on Ginny's reaction, she may be too.

So I follow her until we stop outside a large, heavy wooden door. There is a lion carved into it, and it is a dark mahogany.

"Ginny," I say. "Why are we in front of Professor McGonagall's door?"

"Shhhh," she responds. "Just be quiet for a second." Ginny whispers a spell under her breath, and a small crack forms in the door, big enough to see through.

"Perfect. No one's there," Ginny whispers. "Come on."

She opens the door to Professor McGonagall's office, and I wince when it squeaks. It looks the same as ever-tidy, dark, a stack of ungraded papers on the desk.

"Ginny, what are we going to do?" I ask, nervous.

"Wait and see," she whispers back. And then she chants _wingardium leviosa, _pointing at different things around the room.

As items fly up, I catch on. I cast the spell as well, until almost all of Professor McGonagall's objects are flying.

I giggle to Ginny after we finished, and begin to turn around.

"Girls," a stern voice says behind me, and I twist to meet the terrifying face of Professor McGonagall.

**It would make my day if you reviewed! Thank you!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi there! To answer one reviewer's question, Hermione and Ginny first met McGonagall and Madam Pomfrey in Madam Pomfrey's office. Therefor, they vandalized McGonagall's office directly after while McGonagall was doing something else and not in the area. I should have made that clearer.**

** I was wondering if people prefer me posting longer chapters once a week, or if it would be better if I posted a few times a week, but with shorter chapters. Please let me know!**

** I also reread part of my last chapter a few days ago and realized how rough it is. Turns out editing is really important! Hopefully this chapter will seem a bit more polished, and sorry about all of the mistakes in the last one.**

** It would make my week if you reviewed! As always, constructive criticism is greatly appreciated. **

** Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.**

"Action will have to be taken immediately against both of you," McGonagall says, peering down at Ginny and I from behind her desk. I slink back in my chair.

"We know, Professor," Ginny says. "We're willing to do whatever is necessary in order to keep our records as respectable as possible." The minute Professor McGonagall walked into her office, Ginny snapped out of her rebellious mood and turned into the version of her teachers normally love. I have stayed silent out of inevitable fear.

"I'm afraid that ship has sailed, girls." McGonagall sighs, but I swear I see a hint of a smile on her face. "You, Ginny, shall be in detention for two weeks."

Ginny starts to protest, but McGonagall silences her. "Vandalizing a teacher's office is not model behavior in anyway, and I expected more from both of you. Your punishment shall be served." The vandalizing wasn't even that bad. Professor McGonagall brought all of her items back to earth with one swish of her wand. "You, Granger, are already in trouble because of your pregnancy. I told you that you would be able to stay in school until you are noticeably carrying a baby, but your act of destruction has made me rethink that. You shall head home for your break, but stay there. I wish I didn't have to do this, but your actions made me think otherwise. You may head back to your dorms now."

I want to stay and yell at McGonagall, tell her that what she's doing is incredibly wrong. But I don't want to worsen my punishment, and I can tell Ginny feels the same way. We sheepishly leave the office and, once again, head back to the Gryffindor common room.

"You know, you'll be fine," Ginny says, sensing my dread.

"I guess so. I mean, it can't get much worse, right?" I don't think the extent of my punishment has fully hit me yet.

"Yeah, you'll figure it out," Ginny reassuringly responds.

"I guess so," I repeat. "I have to tell Harry. And Ron. Oh god, how am I going to tell him? We haven't even been speaking recently."

"I don't know, Hermione. Maybe just… quickly?" she says, tucking her hair behind her ear and stepping off of a staircase.

"He hasn't talked about me recently, right?" I ask tentatively.

"Not yet. But he'll come around, you'll see." Ginny says. I want to believe her, but I don't think I do.

We make it to Gryffindor common room, and I take one look around before trying to head upstairs. Ron and Harry are sitting right in front of me, reading on a maroon couch.

"No, 'Mione," Ginny says, pushing me towards the boys. "You have to tell them."

I sigh and nod. I don't want to admit it, but she's right. I head over to them after Ginny gives me one last reassuring smile.

"Hey, guys," I say, taking a seat in the armchair across from them. I try not to concentrate on Ron, but I notice that his eyebrows furrow and he looks away. Harry gives me a worried look.

"Hey, Hermione," Harry says awkwardly.

"I have some news about the whole pregnancy thing," I say. Ron keeps looking at everything but me. "I decided to keep the baby."

Ron finally turns towards me. "Really, Hermione? It's like you try to make life as hard for us as possible. I mean, the least you could do is get rid of it, and this would all be over."

"Ron, maybe you should-" Harry tries to cut in, but he is interrupted again.

"Don't try to fix this Harry. This is Hermione's problem. She said she had worked out the spell, and then she goes and gets herself pregnant. And now she wants to get rid of it! Who do you think you are?" He asks, turning towards me. My mouth falls open as I try to form words, but Ron interrupts me. "We're done, Hermione, in case you weren't aware. I'm leaving." He gets up and exits the common room, slamming the fat lady behind him.

"Well," Harry finally says. "That happened."

I turn to him, raising my voice. "Can you believe him? I mean, he's acting like this is somehow all my fault. I hate to offend his precious, poor little brain, but it takes two people to create a child. Unfortunately for me, the female sex has been blessed with all of the work. I mean, you guys can just walk away!"

"Yeah, Hermione. I'm sorry. It sucks." Harry says.

I keep ranting. "I mean, he shouldn't even really get an opinion. If he's not going to be there for either me or this kid, why does he think he gets to decide what I do with _my own body. _ I mean, no uterus, no opinion, right?"

I take a breath, and remember my original purpose for talking to Ron and Harry. "Oh, and McGonagall kicked me out. I can't come back after I go home this weekend."

"What?" Harry gasps. "How could she do that? What are you going to do?"

"I don't know," I say. "I guess I'll just see what my parents say about me living with them. If not, I'll try to get an apartment or something."

"Do you even have the money for that? And do you still want me to come with you this weekend? I can figure something else out if you'd rather be alone with them"

"No, please come," I say. "And I'll get a job or something. I'll figure it out."

"I can lend you money if you need it," Harry says.

"Thanks," I say. I'm not really in the mood to talk more about this. "I'm going to head upstairs and go to sleep, okay?"

"Really?" Harry asks, looking at me worriedly. "It's only seven."

"Yeah, well I'm tired," I respond bluntly, picking myself up off the couch. "Goodnight, Harry."

Harry gets up and gives me a tight hug. We stay like that for a second. It's nice, to remember what it feels like to have another person understand you if only slightly. "Goodnight, Hermione."

"Thanks," I say softly, and head upstairs.

The next few days pass in a blur. I stay in bed for a lot of the time, not eating much. I don't know if it's nerves or pregnancy, but my nauseas has gotten a lot worse. I find myself barely eating anything out of fear of just throwing it up again. On Thursday I feel so bad I miss all of my classes and meals. Ginny brings me the basics during her free period-some crackers, tea, and a new book from the library.

"You sure you're okay, Hermione?" she asks worriedly while I prop myself up and feebly nibble on a cracker.

"I'm fine, Ginny," I respond. "Just pregnancy."

"Okay, Hermione. But you should go to the nurse if you feel too weird. Send for me if you need anything."

"I will, Ginny." I smile reassuringly, Ginny pats my hand, and then I am left alone with my thoughts.

I decide to start to pack up my stuff for when I head home. I'll be leaving tomorrow, after all. I settle in front of my chest of drawers with Crookshanks on my lap, and begin to pull out stuff and put it neatly in my dusty trunk. I save my nice robes for tomorrow, and a pair of leggings and a sweater to change into. Everything else I fold away.

I finally finish with my clothes and come upon my junk drawer, which is one of my greatest shames in life. I pull put broken quills, ripped paper, and old wrappers and stuff them into a small trash can. As I am finishing up, I come upon my box of photos that Mum gave me.

When I left for my fourth year of Hogwarts, my mother gave me a little chest, just big enough to place photos in. I root through it, sorting the pictures as I go. I put all Ron photos in the recycling, of course- he can sleep with the fishes for all I care. I am nearing the bottom of the box when I pull out a picture of Harry and I during our fifth year. We are sitting at a booth in the Three Broomsticks, our arms around each other's backs. He is looking at the camera, and I am laughing at something he said.

On the back a note is scrawled in his messy writing.

_Hi, Hermione. I just wanted to wish you luck on your O.W.L.s. You'll do great!_

I don't remember ever reading the note. I must of missed it when I first got the picture.

Now that I think about it, I am starting to wonder why Harry and I never dated. I guess we were always obsessing over someone else. But he has been a good friend to me, and he is actually standing by my side with this whole pregnancy thing.

I give my head a slight shake, as if to clear my mind of these thoughts. I have already messed up my relationships with so many people, and I don't want to do the same with Harry. Right now I just need to concentrate on the baby. That's the most important thing.

I stand on the steps of Platform 9 ¾ with Harry, Ginny, and a reluctant Ron. He is looking at the ground and nudging Ginny to try to get her to leave with him. I try to look away from him too. We haven't spoke since he stormed off after I told him about keeping the baby, although Ginny said she mentioned the fact that I was kicked out of school to him.

"Bye, Ginny," I say, pulling her in for a hug.

"Bye, Hermione," she says, holding on tight. "Make sure to write to me often. And if your parents don't let you stay with them, make sure to ask my mom. She's always liked you."

"Thanks," I say, releasing her. I have no plans to stay with the Weasleys if my parents kicked me out. Maybe I'm not looking at this the right way, but I feel like it would be way too uncomfortable. "Bye, Ron," I say, turning to the awkward red head slowly trying to walk away.

"Oh. Um… Bye." I had kind of hoped for more- like an apology- but it's a small miracle he's talking to me at all.

"I guess we better be off, then," I say. We all nod, Harry says his goodbyes to the Weasleys, and then we run through the wall to greet our respective families.

My mother is sitting on a bench in the back corner of the station, looking through her phone. Her dark hair is tied up in a bun behind her, and she is sitting tensely, her back straight.

"Hi, Mum," I say tentatively. I try to remind myself that my parents don't know I'm pregnant yet, that right now everything is normal between us.

"Oh, Hermione!" My mum jumps up, engulfing me in a hug. "It's been so long since I've seen you. I hope school has been going well?"

"Oh, yes, it's fine," I lie. It's taking an impossible amount of energy to act like everything is normal. "Here's Harry, Mom."

"Oh, of course!" She pulls him in for a quick, polite hug.

"Thank you so much for letting me stay with you, Mrs. Granger," Harry says, turning into his polite self. I always find it a little strange how quickly he can switch from a fun, sometimes troublesome boy to someone so serious and well-mannered.

Harry and my mother exchange pleasantries, and then we head to the car. Mum, Harry, and I exchange simple conversation about our school and her work. I stay away from topics concerning Ron. I need to tell Mum about him and the pregnancy, now isn't the time.

We finally arrive home. I always find it strange whenever I come back to town. The house looks the same, the neighborhood looks the same, but everything else feels different.

Harry and I greet my father, a tall man with my brown hair and eyes. After this, I offer to show Harry to his room. Honestly, I just want to get away from my parents. This lying is tearing me up. Thankfully, they say that they're going to go bring home dinner.

"How are you doing, Hermione?" Harry asks after my parents leave.

I sigh. "I'm doing okay," I say truthfully.

"When are you planning on telling them about… you know?" he asks awkwardly.

I chuckle a little. The idea that he can't even say 'pregnancy' seems so strange to me. "I don't know. I mean, I should tell them soon, right?"

"Probably," he says. "You want time to make a plan and stuff."

"Yeah," I say. "Do you want a tour of the house?" I ask, changing the subject.

"Sure," Harry says. I take him throughout the house, showing him the front room, kitchen, and guest room where he'll be staying. We finally arrive at my room.

"Wow," he says upon first walking in. "That's a lot of books."

"Yeah, I guess so," I say. In reality, I don't really like my room now. I haven't changed it much since around the age of thirteen. I still have my calendar up from five years ago, not being home enough to change it. My books are my pride and joy of my room; they are situated on two large book cases, organized by genre and author. Now I walk over and swipe a layer of dust off of one, remembering how I used to love reading fiction. Ever since I got to Hogwarts, my reading taste had moved to more informative documents

"Hey, Hermione?" Harry asks from the opposite corner of the room, examining my cluttered desk.

"Yeah?" I respond, examining my scratched DVD of Mean Girls.

"Ginny and I broke up," he says, his voice casual.

"What?" I exclaim, turning towards him. "When?" My two current closest friends are Harry and Ginny, so I find it crazy that I didn't hear about it before.

"Just yesterday. It was a mutual decision. We're still friends." Harry is still looking at my desk, picking up a picture of me when I was six. I am turned to him, my jaw gaping.

"Well… I guess that's good." I am at a loss for words.

"Yeah. It just wasn't really working out between us," he says.

"Harry?" I ask. "Are you okay?"

He finally turns to me. His expression isn't exactly happy, but he isn't in tears either. "I'm okay," he finally says. "I mean, it hurts a little, but I'll be fine."

"Good," I say. I want to say more, but just then I hear the front door open and my mother's voice calling Harry and I.

We all set the table, and then sit down to Italian food from my mother's favorite restaurant. I glance over to Harry every once in a while, but he doesn't show any abnormal emotions on his face. I find it hard to believe though that he could be so calm after breaking up with Ginny, who I know he really did care about.

"So, Hermione, tell me, how have all your friends been?" my father asks.

"Oh, they're fine," I say, twirling spaghetti around my fork. I don't think now is the best time to get into my current social situation.

"Ginny is doing well, right?" my mother asks. When she first met Ginny they hit it right off over a communal love of baking. Mum always asks about Ginny whenever I come home.

"Of course she is, Mum," I say.

"And what about your little boyfriend? Ron?" my father asks. My hands immediately get sweaty and my breath speeds up.

"Oh, you know, we actually broke up," I say, taking a page out of Harry's book and acting subtle. I rub the back of my neck and sheepishly look down at my pasta.

"What?" my mother gasps. "Why in the world?"

"You know, it just wasn't working out." I think I am literally repeating the conversation I just had with Harry.

"It was probably just a kid thing, Monica," my father says to Mum. "You know how they are. I went through a thousand girlfriends before I met you." I snort a little at that. I find it hard to see my father as someone who could _get_ a thousand girlfriends

"A thousand girlfriends? You were my first boyfriend, Wendell!" I see Harry fight back a laugh from across the table. "But why did you break up, Hermione?"

"Um… I actually want to talk to you about that," I tentatively say. Harry gives me an encouraging nod from across the table. "I'm pregnant."

My mother's face moves from surprise to shock to disappointment in about half a second. My father looks down at his food.

"What do you mean, you're _pregnant_?" my mother asks.

"I made a mistake. Ron's the father. There's something else I need to tell you too." Might as well get the cat out of the bag now.

"What else could you possibly say?" my father asks. Mum is hyperventilating. Harry just looks nervous.

"I can't go back to school. They won't let me," I say.

"Well, then where are you going to stay?" my father asks. Dread pools in my stomach.

"I was kind of hoping I could stay with you," I say cautiously.

"The hell you're going to stay with us!" my mother says, looking me straight in the eye. I can see a fires burning in her iris's.

"Monica, maybe we should talk about this first," my father says, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"No!" she yells. "Hermione has only ever been supported by us, and this is how she thanks us? I will not keep a daughter like this under my roof," she turns to me. "I want you to leave," she growls.

"Mum-"

"No! Get out of my house!" she yells.

I push my chair back and silently get up. There is a fire burning on my tongue, and right now I want nothing more than to release it on her. But I'm not stupid, so I silently make my way down the hall to my room. Harry follows me.

"Hermione-" he says when we reach my room.

"No," I say. "I don't want to hear it. Go get your trunk."

Harry gives me a worried look, but heads to the guest room. When he comes back, he is holding his still-packed brown trunk. I am stuffing everything in visible sight into a ratty old duffel bag. I'm not sure if my parents will let me come back for stuff.

"Hermione," Harry says. I look up at him, my eyes frantic. "Let's just go."

"No," I say, close to tears. "I have to get my stuff… I don't think they'll let me back…"

"Hermione, come on," Harry says, taking my arm. I grab my bag and trunk and then am shoved out the door. As we cross the threshold, I don't see my parents. They must still be in the dining room.

Harry shoves the front door open and then starts walking down the sidewalk.

"Hey," I say, running up to him. "Why'd you do that?"

"What do you mean?" he asks, seemingly oblivious.

"Why'd you just push me out of the house? I should've stood up to them."

"I just did it for your own good." He starts walking down the sidewalk, towards the setting sun.

"My own good? Their _my_ parents." I know I shouldn't be so aggressive, but I did just get kicked out of my house. I think I'm allowed to be in a hostile mood.

"Okay, I'm sorry! I just know that sometimes parents can be harsher than what you expect."

I think about that for a second. I don't know that much about what the Dursleys did to him. I know that he hated them, and that they tried to hide him away from society. "I'm sorry," I say.

"It's okay," Harry says, finally looking up at me. "Where do you think we should stay? You need to find an apartment, right?"

"Yeah," I respond. "I did a little bit of research at Hogwarts, but their isn't that much there house-hunting wise. I was actually thinking that maybe I could stay in one of those apartments in the back of Hogsmeade. I heard that their pretty cheap, and I could still be near everyone."

"Hm…" Harry says, thinking. "That could work, I guess. Should we go now?"

"Yeah. I mean, where else could we stay?" I say. Harry gives me a mischievous smile, and before I can ask him what he's going to do he sticks out his wand as if waving a taxi. All of a sudden a giant purple bus comes barreling out of the air, coming to a sudden stop in front of us.

Harry and I head inside of the Knight Bus. We pay the eleven sickle fee, and then take a seat in the back. They still have their daytime interior set up, with armchairs instead of beds and the curtains open.

"So," Harry says after the bus starts moving again.

"So," I repeat, at a loss for words.

"Are you okay?" he asks, turning towards me. He has a worried expression on his face.

"I'll be fine," I say, which is the truth. "I kind of expected them to do that. I mean, my mum is super Christian. She always talked about how I needed to save myself for marriage and stuff. I just didn't think it would be so sudden."

"I'm sorry, Hermione," Harry says, and I believe him. But I don't want his pity right now.

"Don't be sorry. You didn't do anything. And I'm willing to give up my parents for this baby." I put my hand on my stomach. I have become quite attached to the child already. I guess that makes sense, considering it will live inside of me for nine months.

"Hogsmeade!" Stan calls from the front. We get off the bus and head into the tiny town. It is chilly over here, and the leaves crunch below my feet. My trunk rolls along the rocky ground, getting jostled by the gravel.

"I think the apartments are this way," I say, heading to the back of the village. We come to a tall house with a sign magically attached to the front that says _rooms for rent._ The place looks a little small for apartments, but if there is one thing I've learned while living at Hogwarts it's that things are not always as they appear.

I hold up my hand to knock on the door and look to Harry for confirmation. He just shrugs, so I rap my knuckles on the hard oak wood.

"Just a minute!" a voice calls from inside. I hear crashing from the house, and a minute later a flustered women opens the door. She is wearing a dress with a vintage dragonfly print, and has golden-brown hair that is frizzy and falling over her face.

"Hi there. You kids from Hogwarts?" she asks.

"Um… kind of. We were looking for a place to live. Well, I was. Harry just needs to stay over for a few days." I say nervously.

"Well, you came to the right place. I'm Loretta," she says, and opens the door for us to come in.


End file.
